by Sarah Anne Edwards, LCSW, Ph.D.
Are you surprised at a depth of your grief upon losing a treasured pet? Do others not understand why it is so painful to you?
Losing a cherished pet can be an intensely difficult experience for many people. Pets are often seen as family members, and the bond between an owner and their pet can be very strong. The loss of that bond can result in profound and deeply emotional feelings of grief. But pet owners may be caught off guard by the intensity of their feelings. Especially if it’s difficult for others to understand the role pets play in our lives.
Those who don’t understand my brush off your pain with comments like, “It was just a dog.” “You know pets die.” “You can always get another one.” Such comments fail to acknowledge the owner’s experience and can leave them feeling embarrassed and lonely.
Our grief is a natural and normal response to a heart-wrenching loss. We can deal with it in whatever way best help us to heal. It is important to do so.
There are no standards for how to honor a pet’s death appropriately. Each person is free to do whatever feels most appropriate for their relationship. If you want to make a pillow from a picture of your pet, you should do so. If you’d like to create a memorial page on social media for your pet, do that. If gathering with family and friends who share affection for your pet to reflect and celebrate, do that. What’s important is to take the steps that feel right for you to work through your grief.
Working through grief when a pet dies.
To cope with losing a beloved pet, it’s essential to acknowledge and accept the reality of the situation. It.’s not helpful to dwell on such thoughts as. “I should have” or “I could have,” as that only creates obstacles to the grieving process. Revisiting past decisions won’t change reality, so it’s important to redirect your emotional energy toward honest acceptance by focusing on the truth of the situation with such thoughts as “I am very sad and angry and hurting. I miss her terribly every day.” These thoughts are the ones to attend to.
Seeking out social support and discussing your pet’s death with others who have gone through a similar experience can help alleviate feelings of isolation and loneliness. It can also prevent health problems from setting in because grieving the loss of a pet is not just an emotional experience. It can affect your physical health to. Unprocessed grief can lead to insomnia, aches and pain, fatigue, nausea, loss of interest in life, and lowered immunity.
Take time to grieve and adjust to your new reality. Don’t pressure yourself to “get over it and get on with life.” Providing yourself with the time to grieve and adjust can also help prevent health problems from setting in. You can take one day, an hour, or a minute at a time. Grief has no timetable. The time it takes depends on the depth of your relationship and the importance the pet had to your life.
Instead of trying to move on or suppress the pain, find a new way to channel the love and affection once given to the pet. Find a place to put the love you once showered on a pet when they were alive. It could be getting involved in community charity work or spending more time with family or friends.
Should you get another pet?
The timeline for getting a new pet varies greatly. There’s no set rule for how long one should wait.
Some people try to fill the void of losing their pet by quickly getting a new one. For others, it can be weeks, months or perhaps never. It’s a personal decision and different for everyone. Listen to your needs and feelings to determine when the time is right for you.
When that time is right, adopting a new pet can be a wonderful way to redirect the love you once showered on your lost pet. Just be sure not to use your new pet to bury your grief. It will still be there for a while. Your new pet cannot replace the one you have lost. Resist the temptation to compare them. Your new pet will have a unique personality to become familiar with and develop a relationship to love and enjoy.
Are you surprised at a depth of your grief upon losing a treasured pet? Do others not understand why it is so painful to you?
Losing a cherished pet can be an intensely difficult experience for many people. Pets become family members, and the bond between an owner and their pet can be powerful. The loss of that bond can result in profound and deeply emotional feelings of grief. But pet owners may be caught off guard by the intensity of their feelings. Especially when it’s difficult for others to understand the role pets play in our lives.
Those who don’t understand may brush off your pain with comments like “It was just a dog.” “You know pets die.” “You can always get another one.” Such comments fail to acknowledge the owner’s experience and can leave them feeling embarrassed and lonely.
Our grief is a natural and normal response to a heart-wrenching loss. We can deal with it in whatever way best help us heal. It is essential to do so.
There are no standards for how to honor a pet’s death appropriately. Each person is free to do whatever feels most appropriate for their relationship. If you want to make a pillow from a picture of your pet, you should do so. If you’d like to create a memorial page on social media for your pet, do that. It may help to gather family and friends who share your affection for your pet to reflect and celebrate. What’s important is to take the steps that feel right for you to work through your grief.
Working through grief when a pet dies.
To cope with losing a beloved pet, it’s essential to acknowledge and accept the reality of the situation. It’s not helpful to dwell on such thoughts as “I should have” or “I could have.” Dwelling on such thoughts only creates obstacles to the grieving process. Revisiting past decisions won’t change reality, so it’s essential to redirect your emotional energy toward honest acceptance by focusing on the truth of the situation with such thoughts as “I am despondent and angry and hurting. I miss her every day.” These thoughts are the ones to attend to.
Seeking out social support and discussing your pet’s death with others who have gone through a similar experience can help alleviate feelings of isolation and loneliness. It can also prevent health problems from setting in because grieving the loss of a pet is not just an emotional experience. It can affect your physical health to. Unprocessed grief can lead to insomnia, aches and pain, fatigue, nausea, loss of interest in life, and lowered immunity.
Take time to grieve and adjust to your new reality. Don’t pressure yourself to “get over it and get on with life.” Providing yourself with the time to grieve and adjust can also help prevent health problems from setting in. You can take one day, an hour, or a minute at a time. Grief has no timetable. The time it takes depends on the depth of your relationship and the pet’s importance to your life.
Instead of trying to move on or suppress the pain, find a new way to channel the love and affection once given to the pet. Find a place to put the love you once showered on a pet when they were alive. It could be getting involved in community charity work or spending more time with family or friends.
Should you get another pet?
The timeline for getting a new pet after losing one varies significantly. There’s no hard-and-fast rule for how long one should wait.
Some people will try to fill the void of losing their pet by quickly getting a new one. For others, it can be weeks, months, or perhaps never. It’s a personal decision and different for everyone. Listen to your needs and feelings to determine when the time is right for you.
When that time is right, adopting a new pet can be an excellent way to redirect the love you once showered on your lost pet. Just be sure not to use your new pet as a way to bury your grief. It will still be there for a while. Your new pet cannot replace your past one. Resist the temptation to compare them. Your new pet will have a unique personality to become familiar with and come to love and enjoy.
If you have r questions, please email them to me:
DrSarahAEdwardss@Outlook.com
